The Old Guy

Our band used to practice in Jay’s garage (literally). One motivated time I leaped up from my chair behind the keyboard, and doing my impression of a local lead singer I jumped vertically with the force of a rock star. Unknowingly, the metal track/frame to Jay’s garage door was right above me, and I banged my head so hard that the top of my head was bleeding and later that night I actually went to the hospital to get myself checked for possible stitches and neck injury.

Years ago, Jay came to my wedding, too. And the lovable bum also used to drive every other weekend all the way to Schuylkill County from Mansfield University to continue to drum in our band, even as a 4-year college student. Each passing day, more and more memories like these keep appearing in my head.

Ok, so I’ve never been in the military, so I can’t exactly compare any of these foxhole stories to the band-of-brothers bonding that happens when guys have each other’s lives in their hands. But anyone who has worked with someone for over a decade in ANYTHING knows how tough it is when the person decides to leave the organization. This July, after 11 years of dedication, our drummer Jay will be leaving Toolshed Jack.

Heck, he started out with us as a minor, back in 1999 when he was a senior in high school. I was only in the band for 7 months myself when Jay climbed aboard. To bring in such a youngen felt like a dangerous move at the time, but once he started playing the kit I knew within minutes that he made our band much more respectful. The bottom line with Jay in almost all aspects of him as a music guy, athlete, and other areas is that he is filled with an incredible amount of raw talent.

It’s not going to be easy to picture me in this band without Jay destroying my central nervous system with his cymbal smashing. We’ve shared many a song together, many a beer, many a joke, many a laugh. Damn, is this column turning sentimental? I should really get back to what I do best: Writing jokes about farts and stuff. Maybe next time…

In general, in any band you’re in, it is difficult to replace a long-time band member. When you first join a band, you become part of the chemistry, no matter how new you are. Stupid old cliché’s like “A chain is as strong as its weakest link” are actually true, and over time you get so used to having each other’s backs, covering each other’s mistakes, making every note count. And a bond of some sort happens; It’s inevitable. I’m not saying that bandmates would donate organs for you on your deathbed or anything, but you do get to know people because of all the time you are together, working toward a common goal of rock and roll domination.

Yeah, I’ll miss Jay, and so will Joel and Steve-O. The crowds will miss him a good bit, too. He’s happily married, but I know that if the four of us were all single, he would have the biggest number of groupies. Male ex-high school classmates and coworkers are always coming out to see him, and the females secretly stare at him and think thoughts I’m sure it would be best not to mention here. Our little boy Jay is all grown up now! Now he’s an “old guy”, but watching him figure out his life from high school to the real world has been quite an adventure.

One thing to absolutely admire about Jay was his ability to handle the fact that he was in a cover band for almost 4 years before he was old enough to legally, at our gigs, drink a beer. I’ll never forget when we played a stint in the downstairs area of Crocodile Rock in Allentown when he was just about 18. He was forced to wear a wristband signifying his status of “underaged”. When we were done playing, he wasn’t even allowed to hang out in that downstairs area afterwards (even if he wasn’t “drinking”). As soon as he was done packing up his drums, he was pretty much escorted (forced) out the back door and out of the building. All together now: “Man, that must’ve SUCKED…”.

Eventually, of course, he turned 21 and carried his weight with us for many years to follow. We even found out he could sing. For a year or two before he was 20, Jay was playing in two bands at the same time – the other his own creation/foundation, the now defunct “7-Foot Mullet” (one of my favorite names of a band ever). And although they disbanded (Ha Ha, get it?? I’m funny! No, really!), he stuck it out with Toolshed Jack and contributed to a future continuity that was heavily appreciated by all of us.

I suppose, too, that when you’re a local cover band like we are, you have an extra attachment to your bandmates. 3 of the 4 of us graduated from the exact same high school, and two of us of that school in the exact same graduating class. Do you think the 4th guy would feel left out? No, because he grew up and graduated just in the next town over. So we all have many common stories and general history that we share, common people we coincidentally all know, and even distant family members (2 of the 4 are distant cousins-in-law). There are no transplants in our band: All 4 born and raised in the Skook.

Jay is no exception, and replacing him won’t be easy. Oh sure, a drummer will musically replace him in late July, and the new guy will be as musically talented. But the camaraderie with Jay will be the toughest of all to duplicate. Many crowds don’t understand because they aren’t around for the long practices, the hours of roadie work setting up equipment and breaking it down, and down-time during set breaks. During these times, the four of us shoot the breeze with the best of them, and Jay definitely contributed his share of buffoonery. You the general public would be bored silly to hear too many of our goofball memories with Jay, but to us they produce automatic smirks that couldn’t be bought with all the gold in the world.

Like I said earlier, yeah, I’ll miss the bum. But his intentions of departure are honorable: He wants to spend more time with his wife. Can’t argue that (My own wife wishes I was that smart). Since 2000 our band has an impressive streak of 5 straight departures that were peaceful, and Jay is owed that courtesy many times over. He gave us his 60-day notice, and might be back someday for a night or two if we desperately need him in a pinch. Jay already has an automatic first-ballot induction into the Toolshed Jack Hall-of-Fame, once anyone decides to waste enough money and build one.

So to our buddy Jay, best of success with all your newfound free time. Thanks a bunch for helping us become the party band we never knew we could be, because without you it couldn’t have successfully happened the way it did. Peace out, Blazer.

-Brian from Toolshed Jack